Monday

Fatherloss by Neil Chethik

A few weeks ago I was looking for something in our storage space and I came upon a book that I had read (turns out I still had ten pages to go). It was Fatherloss by Neil  Chethik. I think I had found it in a break room, but it is a really interesting book about men of all ages come to deal with the death of their father. Many of the men interviewed lost their fathers when they were adults while some like me lost theirs when they were children.

Chethik who started writing the book after watching his dad deal with the death of his father (Chethik's grandfather) really gets the emotions stirring, and its not just a book filled with dry statistics. It makes me think about so many of the unresolved issues I still deal with nearly thirty years later. And giving me a plan how to make sure that I don't have any of these issues with Belushi. The book is very centered on the son-father relationship, and how its a different bond that relations with daughters and spouses.

This issue for me is is very much on the forefront of my mind with my father-in-law's ever diminishing health, and how soon we will have to deal with his passing and its effect on our family. Its an older book, but one worth checking out.

3 comments:

Mike said...

I don't think it's something you really every get over. I get nearly as upset thinking about it now as I did when it happened 26 years ago. I definitely feel like there will always be a void in my life. On the upside, I think it will make us very good fathers to our own kids. I love the father/son bond I have with Max.

Mike said...

I've been thinking about it more for the last few years, even before Bacon was born, and certainly now a lot that he is here.

I want to check out that book.

Niel said...

A void is a really good way of putting it.